Let's see, it's the number of times I go pee a day,
times the number of batteries I go through a year,
minus the number of parking tickets I incur annually,
plus the number of times I have to shave per week,
divided by the square root of the fact that I'm a
     "past-my-prime-geek-who-has-difficulty-relating-to-the-world-around-me" 
     (like half the people out there I suppose),
times the number of minutes I spend waiting in line at the bank,
plus the number of girls I could be meeting a year if I wasn't waiting in line,
minus all the Christmas cards I forgot to send,
added to the number of books I want to read but don't ever get around to,
times the number of times my zipper is down a week,
divided by the number of girls I've completely blown it with in the last five years,
plus the tonnage of laundry loads I have to wash a month,
added to the two or three girls a year that I like who don't want to have anything to do with me,
subtracted by the amount of money I loan out a year that never gets repaid,
divided twice by the number of flat tires I seem to get biannually,
minus the number of hours of bad television I endure a week,
plus the haunting uncertainties,
minus all the calls that don't get returned,
factored by the number of times I've eaten alone this year,
and all that other indefinable stuff that seems to get in the way of me getting to know you better,
equals how I've always felt about you


© 2006 by Tony Rauch. All rights reserved.